Attention all publishers!

Dear publisher,

I'm Şenol Onay, author, born in Çorlu in 1965. I've managed to have seven of my books published in a bibliography-poor and anti-democratic country like Turkey. Don't underestimate me; I can be the pen you'll find on the ground while searching in the sky. I offer harsh criticism of the current order with very funny anecdotes, and I also use slang. Let me briefly summarize my secular perspective: I don't see the state as a sacred entity; I believe it's a conglomeration of parasites. I find it repugnant that parliamentary and mayoral candidates don't have exams; I believe they're mere pawns carrying out the orders of the dominant power. Money, the medium of exchange, is the source of all the world's problems. The power that creates money and sets the limits of other states' creation controls the world. In my opinion, slavery hasn't been abolished; it's been disguised, and billions have become slaves to money. The true god is money; derivative gods are invented to lull the people.  I have no connection to chauvinism or theology. I'm a universal humanist, I enjoy meritocracy, and I consider inheritance the greatest enemy of humanity. I believe books should be free, because ideas are valuable, the most beneficial tool for human happiness, development, and health. They should be written by wise men, not rich buffoons, and by those who have something to say to the public.

I've independently translated three of my satirical novels and three essays into English in nine months and am looking for a publisher. I know how difficult it is to attract the attention of a publishing house; even flying side by side with a swallow from Istanbul to London would be futile.

Let me give you a chronological overview of my books. My autobiographical satirical novel, Horgeneral, narrated in the first person, has a universal perspective. I particularly criticized Turkey, and although fictional, many of the anecdotes were real. I heavily criticized the established order and taboos. The reader laughs often but is also bewildered, questioning many things, including official history.

My second satirical novel, Gazilerle Niyaziler, tells the comical adventures of twin brothers.  Metin is the national football team's center forward, Çetin is a staff captain. Strange things happen, they switch places, the footballer goes on operations in military uniform, the officer plays as a center forward, the army and the world of football are examined from different perspectives, and the reader is moved to laughter.

My third novel, Errorist, tells the memoirs of a con artist. My hero, Anıl, makes a fortune by scamming and forms a gang of seven people, including his manager, the con artist. Among these Errorists, who are members of the Errorism ideology, are a mathematics professor, a retired officer, a female doctor, a female journalist, and a Nicaraguan living in Turkey. This comical and unusual work can be considered an epic of rebellion, exploring social distortions and shattering values.

I invented the titles of my essays. I changed the word "vizier," the Ottoman Grand Vizier, to "reziliazam," giving it the meaning of the greatest sinner.  It covers topics such as literature, politics, philosophy, economics, the stock market, terrorism, animals, and sports, breaking the mold and revolutionizing literature with radical, provocative writing.

Deliminator also consists of essays. I was inspired by Terminator. With this word, I implied a person who infuriates people, shared views that contradict tradition and the curriculum, and attacked the sacred values ​​of society like a Quixote.

In my essays titled Paramator, I explored a variety of topics from a revolutionary, questioning perspective; the word evokes the meaning of "money creator."

I designed the cartoon covers for all my books and had them drawn by cartoonists. They are incredibly striking. Even the titles and covers alone can capture the reader's attention. I can redraw and reuse the same compositions.

I can send you any book you'd like to read. Believe me, you won't regret it. I'm sure the chances of losing money if you publish it are not even one in a billion. I spent half my life rebelling, and the other half I planned how to rebel.  I'm ready to erupt like a volcano, just hit the nail on the head and see me wield my pen more effectively than Che's machine gun.

Are you ready to charge shoulder to shoulder?