Yabancı yayınevine ulaşmak çok zordu, toplamda dördü dosyanı gönder demişti, birisi de tırtıkçı çıktı, beni keriz zannediyor, basım masrafını karşılamamı istiyor, üstelik servet istiyor. Siz bana para vermelisiniz, dedim, irtibatı kestim. Aslında ilk günden adresimi istemesinden niyetlerini anlamıştım. Sözleşme metni diye gönderilen soygun belgelerini paylaşıyorum. 👇

Borsa bugün güya yüzde 0.60 yükseldi ama çoğu hisse düştü. Erdoğan devrinde reel kazanç imkansız demeyeyim, yorumu size bırakayım.

Çeviriler nedeniyle kendimi ödüllendirdim

Enflasyon düşmüyor, iktidar değişmiyor, borsa U30'daki belli hisselerle yukarı çekiliyor. Erdoğan ile olmuyor, 22 senede Türkiye hayli geriledi, fakirleşti. CHP de iyi bir alternatif değil, demek ki ilelebet sürüneceğiz. Enflasyonu düşük açıklıyorlar, ücretli ve memurun maaşına az zam yapılıyor, bütçeye kaynak yaratılıyor, yani çarçur edilen para memura, işçiye, emekliye fatura ediliyor.

Gazilerle Niyaziler (it means veterans and those who died in vain)

We said it was necessary on the passenger road, and threw ourselves into the canyon full of windings. We were going to defend the homeland with young workers who flew like partridges in the scrubland, who hopped like antelopes, but whose citizenship was forgotten except when they were preparing their tax returns; while the patriots who were resting in their mansions on the Bosphorus after the previous night's prostitution, entertainment and all the pleasures they were addicted to were stretching themselves stupidly. When they fought for sovereignty, the homeland belonged to the farmers and workers, when it came to the cream of the crop, the homeland belonged to the bankers, I had never bothered about this reality until that moment. (Gazilerle Niyaziler, it means Vveterans

Birinci ayın sonunda durum böyle oldu, baklavaları dilim dilim dilimleyeceğim, 13.05.2025'de 60 yaşına gireceğim, o gün yine fotoğraf çekeceğim.

A paragraph from Gazilerle Niyaziler

I don't want to trivialize words like bombastic writers, I don't want to describe our breathing, our steps, etc.; since they have nothing to say, they take refuge in the mask of style, they increase the abundance of ornate sentences, they trite the description. I am not ungrateful, so I don't mean Western Bloc writers; fancy sentences reinforced with parentheses are a disease specific to Easterners, even if they think they are modern, Turkishness has permeated them everywhere.

1 Aralık 2024

Üç aylık maaşım

Üç aylık maaşımı aldım, 56 263.54 tl olmuş, öncekine göre 97.34 tl azalmış, oysa hastaneye gitmedim, neden kesinti yapıldığını anlayamadım. TÜİK'in inandırıcı olmayan enflasyon rakamlarıyla ücretlilerin ve emeklilerin maaşları azaltılıyordu, herhalde ilave vergiler icat edilmiş. Aylığım 18 754.513 tl, 540.631 USD oluyor, ye ye bitmez!

Dua Lipa, Levitating Featuring Dababy

The chorus seems to be taken from the Bee Gees' song "Stayin Alive", it reminded me of that song.

Sucuk oldular

27.11.2024

Ömrümce aşağıdaki çita gibi hareket ettim, ders çalışsaydım belki Türkiye birincisi olabilirdim

Bir yarış için bir çitayı ve köpekleri ayrı ayrı hazırladılar. Ama yarış günü çita yarışmak istemedi. Fotoğrafta köpekler ile çita arasındaki hızlı yarış görülüyor. Amaç kimin en hızlı olduğunu görmekti. Çitanın yerinden kıpırdamamasına herkes şaşırdı. Yarış koordinatörüne ne olduğunu sorduk. Bu resmi gördükten sonra şu cevabı verdi: Bazen çok iyi olan en iyi olduğunu kanıtlamaya çalışmak hakarettir. Gücümüzü göstermek için başkalarının seviyesine inmemize gerek yok. Dikkatli düşünün ve enerjinizi yapacağınız şeye saklayın. “Çita hızını yalnızca avlanmak için kullanır, köpeklere en hızlı ve en güçlü olduğunu kanıtlamak için değil." National Geographic World..

I will send an e-mail to foreign publishing houses like this

Two paragraphs from my second humorous novel, the veterans and those who died in vain (Gazilerle Niyaziler)

Despite the north wind, I was as hot as a seagull chasing after its prey. If my best friend hadn’t said, “There’s Ms. Sengul, there,” I would never have guessed that the acupuncturist Emel-looking, jacketed, gathered-skirted and stylish lady could be our dietician. The strikingly beautiful beauty had a lace magazine in her hand, so she was skilled at crocheting lace and interested in different motifs in sewing; the budgie tattoo on her left wrist had faded. A Kamasutra book or a book explaining Taoist sex techniques would suit a monument of clothing of this caliber. I call her a woman like pith; she was bursting with lewdness, striking figure, polished nails, kohl-painted eyelashes, and especially her pink lipstick. I should have prostrated myself before the engineer who designed the rare lip pencil. The swaggering babe had more than the frivolous concubines of the Ottoman palace, she had no less; a man who would seduce her would have to eat mesir paste every day. There was not a gram of excess fat on her firm body, but I will not speak in advance, as I have never seen her naked. She was in her early thirties, brown, with luscious wavy hair hanging down to her waist, her manicure and pedicure were perfect, her sex appeal was pushing the limits, she was wearing a seductive blouse, her breasts looked like anti-aircraft missiles and could excite even mad dervishes. I had become mentally ignorant with the lust of a well-groomed quail. She saw us too, smiled friendly, her thighs jiggled as she approached us. “Hello,” I said, “Honey, where have you been? I was looking for you,” she replied. She looked me in the eye as if she were going to eat me. Her gestures were so informal that I thought sportsman Metin had slept with her many times. I said to Ali Kemal, “Anyway, sift the valuable documents, let our worthless jewel gain value,” meaning you can go now, and I winked at him without letting her know. “Yes, Ms. Sengul, I am listening,” I said, but the airy woman replied, “Come on, let’s meet in my room.” I followed the dietician who was leading the way, may I be sacrificed for the magnificent curves of her hips, she was swaying like a city line ferry sailing in the south-west wind. When we got to the room, my blood pressure had skyrocketed, my pulse was around 150 beats per minute, “Just keep your shorts on, can you lie down on your back here,” she said. I said to myself, “What a strange thing this is, the woman is really into sex, she is really horny, she is going to hurry up the crack, she is going to scratch my balls with my dick. I will take off my underwear like I am peeling off a banana peel, so she can see what it means to dress with a low-cut dress,” and I lay down on my back. The attractive woman gave the impression of a typical saxophonist, I thought she would take off her bustier in a minute and we would fuck, but I was wrong. She attached some cables to my feet, I don't know if they were copper, wire or plastic. I thought the insatiable woman was a masochist, that she used me as a test bed, that she would give me a current to satisfy her perverted passions, and that she would whip me later, but I was wrong in my guess. About a minute passed, "I weighed the analyzer result, your body fat percentage was twelve percent last time, now it's down to eleven percent. There is no doubt that you are balanced with vegetable oil, your photogenic appearance confirms this, you look wiry, congratulations,” he said. “You are a dick enthusiast, you are becoming a bitch, if you had lice in the mountains, you would be skinny,” I couldn’t say; “I follow the program consisting of carbohydrate, protein, mineral combination to the letter, thanks to you I am as thin as a carbine,” I flattered. There was a trick in my nature, I was still hoping that we would make love, that I would probe her very tight vagina. My manners do not allow me to say how vulgar I have become, but as a clue, I will say, “It is a Chinese thing, a Japanese thing, two people doing this, one male, one female, plug and play, finish the job,” so that the wise can understand, and let them mate in jacuzzis with geishas who are not resistant.

Hoppala!

Unbelievable things are happening!

I will be sixty in six months, I am currently doing the most important work of my life, I am working more intensively than ever, as if I am disconnected from the world, I live in another world and I am racing against time. When I translated my first book into English, I went crazy with joy, because it was a utopian goal for me, I did not waste time looking for a publisher on the internet, I started translating the second one, I am going full speed ahead, I will not stop until I translate all seven into English, then I will write the projects in my notes in English. My final goal is to settle abroad and have my books published in foreign languages, then I will not worry even if I die.

Twitter, facebook, whatsapp, yahoo

Twitter Elon Musk aldıktan sonra tamamen değişti, adı bile x oldu, kuş logosu kaldırıldı, ücret karşılığı üyelikler başlatıldı, hesaplar kolayca kitlenmeye, askıya alınmaya, erişime kapatılmaya başladı, bence oranın sonu geldi, aklı başında biri zaman harcamaz. Mesela ben asıl hesabımı senelerden beri kullanmıyorum, çünkü inanılmaz bir yere döndü, artık birine direkt mesaj yollayamıyorsunuz, hatta gönder tuşuna bastığınızda hesabınız kitleniyor. Google ve iştiraklerini çok beğeniyorum, twitter o holdinge aitti, bu blog, gmail, youtube da onların, oralarda kendimi özgür hissediyorum. Facebook ve iştiraki olan whatsapp'a da güvenmiyorum, bence her dalevereyi yapabilirler. Yahoo da fırıldakçı, senolonay@yahoo.com mailimi göz göre göre uçurdular, sayısız girişimime rağmen açmadılar. Görüşlerimi aktardım, dikkatli olun, google ve bağlıları haricindeki yerlerde tedbir alın.

Kılıçdaroğlu acayip laflar etmiş. 👇

Twitter

I opened a fake account on Twitter to search for foreign publishing houses, last night when I sent a direct message to a publishing house, my account was locked, I opened it after a difficult test, I wrote under someone's post, my account was locked again, I opened it again but I closed the account because I understood that there was no stopping on that platform.

Turkey's dire situation

The ruling party officials said that countries like America, England, France, Germany were jealous of Turkey, millions of party members believed this. While the real inflation was 150 percent in my opinion, TÜİK announced it as 85 percent, in that environment the Central Bank reduced the interest rate it lent to banks to nine percent, then to eight and a half percent, the deposit interest rate of savers remained below twenty percent, as a result inflation got out of control; since civil servant, worker and pension salaries were determined according to TÜİK inflation rates, the purchasing power of wage earners eroded, and it became very difficult for tenants to survive. Turkey's foreign debts also swelled, and while there was such a dire economic outlook, millions of Syrians, Afghans, ... refugees were allowed to cross the border into Turkey, and no one probably knows the number.

The last four paragraphs of the Horgeneral:

I said I changed, I really became civilized, I adopted logic, I rooted my spirituality, I became informed. In the past, I was angry at the carelessness, ignorance, ingratitude, clumsiness, and lack of culture of the intellectuals in Turkey, I used to curse, I used to get nervous for no reason, but now I have broken my bond of belonging, I make fun of them. When objective literary people learn about my rejection and the indifferent attitude of the fickle publishers, they laugh until tears flow from their eyes, and sometimes they even cross themselves. At that moment, my heart is in tears, I cannot hide my embarrassment and the blush on my face. Even Coni, who has Turkish blood, cannot stand being made fun of, becomes surly and pecks the English, who laugh heartily at our pitiful emptiness; he has already reached the age of maturity, suffers from indigestion and gets angry easily; because of his small size, they consider his attacks as tickling, but I would not be surprised if one day he puts out the eye of a bookish person. Only Rose is understanding, does not make fun of my fossilized fellow countrymen and does not anger the fearless Coni. I attribute her insensitivity to her doghood, am I right? You may think that I feel imprisoned and miss my homeland, based on the classic saying, “They put a nightingale in a golden cage, and it said, ‘Ah my homeland!’” Let me write for the Atatürkists and orientalists who like to tinker and are curious about the past. Which homeland? If there are warriors who die for it and modernize it, it is a homeland, if traitors who flee from war become rich, if theorists without medals are charred, if those who currently smile pleasantly on those lands are miserable; if the children of martyrs and veterans are cursed ungratefully and sob with a sorrowful face, the rest is a lie. He who has not suffered cannot know the value of pleasure. Do I miss the blizzard of Ankara when Coni is with me? I have distanced myself from the Middle East, I have closed the book of Turkey forever, I know neither chargé d'affaires nor ambassadors; I have forgotten the limitations, the spiritism, the sluggishness, the timetable, the feudalism, the favoritism, the ambition, the missionary, the exploitation, the partisanship, the swindle, the trickery, the hesitation, the damnation, the indifference, the irritability, the swindling, the deceitfulness, the restlessness, the sorrow, the veiling, the lack of freedom, the resentment, the hardness, I enjoy the British air. Life is nice, the rest is useless! The serious impudence or original puppet-hood of privileged skullduggers does not bother me. Of course I will not drive a stake into the world, I will grow old, and sooner or later I will rest in the cemetery. I did not want to curse the suspicious Turkish diaspora, I am sorry; I came into the world as a slave Turk, I will go out as a mighty Englishman, that is why I am proud, I have become a humanist and have reached spiritual fulfillment. There is another change in England that I find strange and have difficulty adapting to. In Turkey, I never went out with an umbrella, I used to supplement it with a hood. At first I did this stupidity, but I gradually got wiser and started to take two umbrellas with me on days when the meteorologists warned of heavy rain. With one I protected myself from the rain that was falling in drops, and with the other, which I used as a shield, I protected myself from a greater disaster, namely vehicles splashing muddy water on me; however, in orderly London, one umbrella is more than enough. Oh, those stoic and dignified Anglo-Saxons! Let alone getting wet, they don’t even know how to be a bravado. Water finds its bed. Ekrem Cesur, who became alienated from his own country while serving as a captain in the ranks of the Turkish Armed Forces, accepted defeat, sadly took his bundle to his seat, was later promoted to the rank of Horgeneral, could not succeed despite his long efforts within the Turkish Unarmed Forces and changed his residence, offers his respects to his literary compatriots, his concerns to the mischief-makers who make the spider-like Turkey uninhabitable for enlightened Turks, who cause them to emigrate, who encourage them to travel around the world, to become refugees, to be outcasts and to be homeless. Let our existence be a gift to the torturers who sing the song “How happy I am a Turk!” and the arrogant show-offs, may our hearts be filled with joy, may tragicomic writers live long!

Hey amigo, che Sabata!

My biggest dream was to translate my books into English, I read English novels for years, I considered increasing my vocabulary to 70-80 thousand, more valuable than having 50 billion dollars, I recently saw that I can now translate myself. I will not stop until I translate all seven of my works, I have gone crazy in one word, I have disconnected from the world, I now listen to music to relax, I do weight training six days a week, I will also slice my abs, I will rise from the ashes, then I will settle in a foreign country, preferably England, I will write and read until I die in London in 2030, I will leave the world I came to ignorantly, having learned a little.

Caravan

I think the best life in Turkey can be in a caravan, I have not come across one with Turkish plates, I saw Bulgarian minibus type caravans in Kırklareli, the back of the driver's cabin was a dormitory, I liked it very much.

20.11.2024

My readers

Except for the female teacher who read Reziliazam, none of my readers contacted me for literary purposes; they all believed that Horgeneral's adventures were real and believed in the fortune the novel's hero earned from the stock market, and approached me for personal gain.

My future plan

After translating my first satirical novel, Horgeneral, into English, I will try to reach foreign publishers, but I will not delay, I will translate all my other six books into English, I will write my new books in English, if I wait to settle abroad, my life may not be long enough.

What a ridiculous situation

Fenerbahçe club official spokesman announced that they will not send a basketball player to the national team because the national basketball team coach is a Galatasaray fan and celebrated Galatasaray's 3-1 away win over Fenerbahçe, and in fact, no Fenerbahçe player was invited to the Turkey-Hungary basketball match. Such an event is only seen in tribal states, and Turkey has fallen into this state.

The state

The dominant power has established a system to govern and control the people, called it the state, and placed the people it wanted in the management. This is the essence of the formation that billions of people call sacred. There is no exam for the candidates for deputy or mayor; all it takes to become a candidate is to donate a large sum of money to the party; someone prepares the list and the people vote for them, thinking they are making their choice with their own free will.

Turkey

I will be sixty in six months, I have never come across a solid product or a reliable person in Turkey (except for my late father). Goods, food, clothing, ... are all fraudulent, there is no one who does not lie! I was also lying until recently, I still could not be honest, I remain silent instead of writing the truth on the subjects I am knowledgeable about. Quality products are not sold in our country, for example Sony was fired. I can't find durable shoes. We are condemned to thin and terrible quilts and blankets. The world knows our fruits and vegetables, European countries have banned the import of fruits and vegetables from Turkey since my youth (in the eighties). We extract the juice from oranges with syringes. I bought at least ten headphones in the last ten years to listen to music, all of them broke and malfunctioned in a short time. I have given many examples in my books. I have no other ideal than to get rid of this country and write until my last breath!

European Nations League

A tournament as unnecessary as the European Nations League is unthinkable. I do not doubt the sanity of those who planned the organization, I think they established a ridiculous league so that the European Super League would not be established.

TUS 2024 EYLÜL SIRALAMASI

Teofilo Stevenson

In my opinion the best boxer of all time was the Cuban Teofilo Stevenson, who won most of his fights by knockout in the first round until the year he quit boxing; he was offered a fortune to turn professional and fight Muhammad Ali but he refused, he said he would not fight for money, he was a sincere socialist.

Mike Tyson

Don't underestimate Mike Tyson because he's 58, I'm 59, after a little diet I can do wonders in cage boxing in my ideal weight class, besides Tyson is a beast, he's a thousand times stronger than me, he can surprise the audience. Thanks to Tyson I discovered how to punch hard, because despite his very short height and light weight he was knocking out giant boxers in the first round, I thought about the reason for this for hours, I understood how the fingers should be at the moment of the punch. In my opinion, Mike Tyson is the greatest boxer in history after Teofilo Stevenson.

Religion

The fashion of closing markets during Friday prayers has resurfaced, women do not go to Friday prayers, in other words, both religious tyranny is being carried out and women are being humiliated. What wouldn't I do to be saved from the hell of Turkey? There are perhaps a hundred different religions and beliefs, so they all accuse the others of being fabrications, at best one is right, and there is a possibility that the materialists are right.

I have a terrible hunger for knowledge

I have a terrible hunger for knowledge, I am probably one of the few people who read the most books in Turkey, but I know that I am completely ignorant, because there is unprecedented censorship here, I think that everything I know to be true, especially history, may be wrong, if I can settle abroad, I will immerse myself in uncensored and didactic works, I will gain some knowledge in the world I came to ignorantly.

Take notes!

If I could leave Turkey and settle in a modern country, I would never look back, I would not go back even if I knew I would die, I would not talk to any Turks abroad, I would write in English until my last breath.

Şenol Onay is coming, get away!

I will be sixty in six months, this is the first time I have come this close to my ideal of emigration, which has been my biggest dream since the first year of high school. I know that I am a world-class writer, but I am ignored in Turkey because of my satirical nature, honesty, diligence, talent, white skin, and brown eyes... The sale of my books (I uploaded all seven to Google Books, I secured them) was blocked, and now I can't even find a publisher. I can finish the translation of the first of my seven books, Horgeneral (a satirical novel), in a few weeks, I am as excited as a baby, I will look for a publisher after I finish it, if I can find one, I won't worry even if I die. If I can translate my other books and get them published, and also if I can get a permanent visa and settle abroad, I will be the happiest person in the world, maybe I will go crazy with joy. I really want to reach the British, French, Americans, Japanese, Germans and Russians, because only a jeweler knows the value of gold.

Üç sayfayı paylaşayım, sizce borsa yüzde 0.80 artmışa benziyor mu? Hileli yapı var mı, yok mu?

Endeks yüzde 0.74 artıda ama hisselerin ezici çoğunluğu dökülüyor, bir sayfayı paylaşıyorum, hileli yapılanma var mı yok mu onu siz belirleyin. Erdoğan gitmeden bu borsanın hayrını göremeyiz. 👇